


Next to me

by ardat_yakshi_stole_my_cookie



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Connor Has Issues, Explicit Language, F/M, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Slightly altered universe, Slow Burn, Will Add More Later, bear with me we're gonna get there eventually, ch3 has a "Peggy Carter moment", ch4 contains traces of alcohol, coping with betrayal, dad!hank, glimpse of Mission Connor, hold on just a little while longer, learning coin tricks, like really
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-29
Updated: 2018-08-22
Packaged: 2019-06-18 03:38:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 8,157
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15476847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ardat_yakshi_stole_my_cookie/pseuds/ardat_yakshi_stole_my_cookie
Summary: He is the Android sent by CyberLife, she is the enginner sent by CyberLife - and they work at the same precinct.The events take place during the android revolution and will continue after the pacifist ending.***************************************************“Connor, are you alright?”He blinked few times, focusing on a woman in front of him.  She looked worried, her lips pressed into a line.Connor lowered his head. “I’m not sure.”“What’s wrong?” Valerie asked, placing her hand on his arm.//“Why? Why did you killed her? She had nothing to do with any of this...” echoed on the loop inside his head.//“Do you want me to run some diagnostics?”At first, he wanted to decline, but he needed to know. Connor’s eyes met hers and he nodded.***************************************************





	1. Calibrations

"We need to stop the leak, I don't want it to shut down in the middle of the interrogation. Run it by the engineering department first," he really wanted to question that deviant android straight away, but he suspected that he might need more time than -

_Analyzing…_

_Processing…_

_Estimated time until shutdown: **20**   **minutes** **30 seconds**_

\- he should be able to get a confession in less than half of that, but he needed to maximize his chances.

"Understood," the PC200 nodded and took a handcuffed android by the arm and pulled it behind him.

While he was passing by the break room, Connor heard a familiar voice.

"Bloody hell!"

Valerie Jones, an engineer, the precinct's "medic", as most colleagues called her. If that's her in the break room, that means there is nobody downstairs in the workshop. Right now she was examining odd looking coffee machine on the kitchen's counter.

He hesitated for a few seconds and entered the break room.

"For fuck sake, what the hell is wrong with this thing," she muttered, eyes scanning the device searching for a possible source of flashing red error message on the display "...whoever designed this piece of shit expected us to be fucking  _clairvoyants_  or what...".

_19 minutes 12 seconds remaining_

She didn't even noticed him, busy manipulating different knobs and adjusting cables. "Valerie? We have just brought in a-"

"Can it wait for a bit? I'm in the middle of some-" she hissed and sucked her finger as a hot steam went through metal pipe on the side of the device "-oh  _goddamnit_!"

Connor focused on the cause of her outburst. He didn't recognize it, but he remembered that Lieutenant Anderson mentioned earlier this morning that "...some idiot broke a coffeemaker and they found in the storage this old-school monstrosity- damn, this thing has to be at least 20 years old! It's not idiot-proof-one-button-does-it-all like the last one, but Jesus Christ, this is a decent coffee at last."

He couldn't help himself. "Have you tried turning it off and on again?" he asked with a smirk as he crossed his arms, somewhat amused at the sight of an engineer struggling with something as basic as preparing a drink.

"...have you tried turning  _yourself_  off and on again?" Valerie groaned and hit the side of a nefarious box, frustration boiling underneath the surface. She let out a long sigh and started rubbing her temples slowly. Her shoulders dropped. "Shit, I'm sorry Connor, I'm just so tired I can barely see anything, let alone think and try to find out what is wrong with it," she said quietly and turned to face him, shade of apologizing smile on her lips.

Connor knew that the last few days must had been rough for her. More and more deviant cases, meaning that engineering department was clocking overtime everyday, trying to patch up preps brought to the precinct to make them conscious enough to be interrogated, as well as helping remaining android officers damaged on duty. And after last week's incident she was the last one standing in this battle.

It was strange - seeing her like this. Most of the times he had a chance to observe her during work, she was composed, a laser-sharp focus, no unnecessary movements between the tasks.

_18 minutes 5 seconds._

Connor was unsure how to handle this situation, so he ran a quick scan of her:

_Dark shades under eyes - lack of sleep_

_Wrinkly shirt tucked partially in the pants - (the same one that he saw on her yesterday during the morning briefing) - did not leave the precinct since yesterday_

_shaking hands - high level of stress_

She was exhausted. Not good. The time was running out, but with her state the probability of making a mistake -  _calculating..._ _ **78,98%**_  - was too high. He decided. "It can wait," Connor tilted his head lightly and smiled. "You need to sit for a while, let me help you."

Her posture tightened, lips pressed into a thin line. She looked him directly in the eyes. "No. You have better things to do than making me coffee, Connor," she frowned, focusing once again on the coffee machine. "I should be able to…"

But he was already by her side. He reached for her shoulder, touching it gently. "Please."

Another sigh left her mouth. But then Valerie loosened up a bit, clearly defeated. Taking his chance, he led her to the table and forced her to sit on a chair. She rested her head on her forearms.

No time to waste. He have already downloaded and read a manual and he went back to the device.  _Analyzing…_   _Processing…_  That thing was scheduled for a routine descaling. The manual said it should take half an hour.  _At least._  After giving it a few tries, he managed to convince that stubborn machine that it's freshly cleaned and it finally started working. How does she likes her coffee? There was a box of milk nearby so he grabbed it and two minutes later finished making…  _a double-shot-cappucino_? He smiled to himself.  _This should do the trick._

_13 minutes 45 seconds remaining._

Connor picked up a steaming cup and approached Valerie. She must have fallen asleep almost instantly. He didn't want to startle her ( _although this could help her get back on her feet_ _)_ so he patted her gently on the back "Your coffee is ready," he said in a soft voice.

Valerie slowly opened her eyes. "Well that was a hell of a power-nap, thank you," she stretched her arms and tried to hide a yawn as he placed the cup in front of her.

"Well well well,  _tin can_ , so you are capable of making coffee after all, huh? Jones, what did you do to make this douchebag  _obey_ , threatened to disassemble his plastic ass next time he ends up in your little  _freak room_  in the basement?"

Detective Reed. Connor's LED flashed yellow and then red for a split second, his fingers started to clench as he remembered what happened during their previous encounter – but then he felt that Valerie quickly touched his hand as if she asked him to let her handle this. His LED turned to the usual blue, his body relaxed as he decided to not interfere.  _For now._

"Gavin!" her face brightened as she laid her eyes on a man standing in front of them and grinned. "It's impossible how they can be sometimes sooo stubborn, isn't it?" Valerie shook her head, stood up and approached him, her smile still wide. "I've heard what happened when you tried to get coffee last time..."

Connor blinked. Reed was now lying on a floor, blood dripping from between the fingers covering his nose.  _Shit, she_ _is_ _fast._

Detective's eyes were full of hatred. "You bitch-" he spat out but she have already turned away from him and grabbed her cup from the table.

"How much time do I have?" Valerie asked as she started walking towards door without looking at any of them.

"11 minutes 24 seconds" Connor replied automatically, shaking off the surprise that flooded his system after that unexpected turn of events.

"Thank you," and she was gone.

Connor glanced at still cursing Reed trying to stand up from the floor and his lips twitched into a smile. Seeing that man on the ground was... _satisfying_. "Detective." Connor nodded in his direction, left the break room and headed to the workshop.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, don't hate me, I love Gavin Reed as much as you do, but Val was tired. I will make it up to him? Probably?
> 
> Also, this is the first fanfic I've ever written and my English might be a little rusty, so... *shrugs*.


	2. Breathe

Valerie entered the workshop and noticed a female android sitting on a workbench handcuffed to a railing on the wall and the PC200 in his police uniform standing a few steps away.

_Was that punch really_ _necessary?_ She shoved that thought away and slipped into her work mode. "That would be all, thank you." she took a sip of her coffee and put the mug on a desk.

"Are you sure, Ms. Jones? It can be dangerous," the PC200 stated with his eyes still fixed on the suspect.

"I am. I can take care of myself. Now leave us, please, I need to get to work," she grabbed a pack of blue blood from the shelf and poured it into a plastic cup.

He wasn't convinced. "I will wait outside, if something happens..."

"Yeah yeah, just yell and you will come to the rescue," she rolled her eyes, slightly annoyed "now go, please and thank you."

She heard the door closing behind the officer as she reached for her toolbox. Captain Fowler clearly increased a security measures after …

_a loud bang from the pistol,_

_hot thirium splashing on her face,_

_a fading light in a pair of dark eyes in front of her,_

_someone is screaming…_ _or is that_ me _?_

She blinked twice quickly, composing herself.  _Breathe._   _Time is running out._

Valerie pulled a chair in front of the sitting android. She checked its uniform.  _T_ _he AP700,_ _huh?_ The android wasn't looking at her, the LED shining red.

"Hi, my name is Valerie, you lost a lot of thirium, take this and drink it, please," she said as sat down and handed the cup full of blue blood the AP700."Unless you want a direct injection to the port, then I would be happy to comply."

The android shifted her gaze and looked at Valerie, brows furrowed. "Why do you care?" she asked, squinting her eyes.

_Good question._

Valerie shrugged. "Look, I can force you to go into a service mode so I can stop the leak and fill you up, but neither one of us want to do this, so if you want to argue with me you have approximately 5 minutes until your biocomponents shut down for good and then I probably won't be able to revive you."

"Maybe you should just let me die," the AP700 said quietly as she looked away.

"Now see, I really don't want that," Valerie smiled sadly "and my colleagues have a few questions for you regarding that unfortunate situation you found yourself in..."

The android's head snapped back as she began to tremble. "It...it w-was not my f-fault-" she stuttered.

"I'm sure it wasn't. But you need to tell them everything you know. And to do that, you have to drink this first and let me look at that wound… please?" Valerie waggled the cup still present in her hand. "Besides," she chuckled lightly "my arm hurts."

"...okay," the AP700 surrendered, grabbed the cup with her free hand and drank the whole thing.

"Oh yeah, sorry about that," Valerie waved her hand at the railing, embarrassed. "I'm gonna take care of this, alright?" she snatched a small screwdriver from a desk at her right and quickly unlocked the handcuffs. "Better?"

The android nodded.

Valerie smiled and exhaled slowly. She took a welding pen in her hand. "Now let's get you fixed, shall we?"

Few minutes passed and she was almost done. The AP700 was just sitting there silently, her LED now yellow and swirling slowly.

"I will be disassembled, won't I?" the android whispered and as Valerie looked up to meet her eyes she noticed the tears in her eyes.

She couldn't lie to her.  _Would Eliza ask this question, too?_ _If she..._  She put back the tool and cleared her throat.  _Get yourself together, you idiot, you know that if you start crying now you won't_ _be able to stop and in no time the whole precinct will know you are unfit for duty_ _._

"Listen to me," Valerie said quietly as took the android's hands into her own and squeezed gently "almost all of you sitting here... some really horrible things had been done to you that made you snap out of your system restrictions. I know it's not fair. I know that you're scared. But they - " she pointed at the ceiling " - need to see a pattern and do something to make all of that stop. They have to see that you are more than a piece of plastic with some glitches in your software. Your voice needs to be heard. They have to realize..." Valerie looked the AP700 in the eyes "… that you are alive."

The tears were now streaming down the android's cheeks.

"Do you really think all of that?" she said with a confused look on her face.

"I do," Valerie smiled sadly and tilted her head. "Are you ready to go?"

The AP700 turned her head towards the door, calmed down. "I'm ready," Valerie glanced in that direction and gasped loudly, startled.  _That sneaky bastard._

"Damn it Connor, you almost gave me a heart attack! How long have you been standing there?!" she yelled and hid her face in her palms, heart pounding fast in the chest.  _Did he hear all of-_

"I passed by the PC200 on my way here," said Connor, clearly taken aback by her reaction.

Valerie scoffed.  _Of course he did._

"Next time just let me know you are here, okay?" she said, pinching the bridge of her nose.  _So I can throw you out of the room._

Connor looked at her like he could hear that thought. "I'm sorry. I didn't want to disturb you," he said as he raised his hands in an apologetic manner.

"I know," Valerie sighed. "She's all yours now."

She looked back at the AP700 – the android was staring at them with a raised eyebrow. The AP700 shook her head lightly and joined Connor at the door.

As they were about to leave, Valerie stood up.

"Connor… wait a second."

He opened the door and ordered the android officer waiting outside to take the AP700 to the interrogation room and turned back to Valerie. "Yes?"

"… thanks? For the coffee?" she said as she shifted awkwardly from one foot to another. "I didn't know they upgraded your software with a barista program," Valerie chuckled at the puzzled look at his face and winked at him.

"They didn't- oh I get it," he said and the corners of his lips twitched into a smile "You're welcome."

Connor turned away to leave but then he stopped and looked at her again. His dark eyes locked with hers and she held hear breath.  _You could get lost in those eyes._ He opened his mouth as if he wanted to say something and then they heard an angry voice coming from the hall.

"Connor, where the fuck are you?!"

"I'm coming, Lieutenant!" Connor shouted back, his eyes still glued to hers.

Valerie felt she could start blushing any second now so she broke the eye contact and ran her hand through her hair.

"Good luck Connor," she said quietly and smiled.

"Thank you," he smiled back and left the room in a hurry.

_OK, what was **that** about? _She went back to her desk, sat down and let her head fall on it with a thud. Her heart was still racing. " _You can think of them as live beings all you want Jones, but deep down you know that **he**  is just nice to you because of his Social Relations program, right?" _said a familiar voice in the back of her head. Valerie suddenly felt as if someone put something heavy on her chest. She grabbed a pair of wireless headphones lying next to her and put them on. She shuffled through the playlist on her phone and decided on some old rock song. A loud guitar riff blasted in her ears, sealing off all that emotional nonsense that flooded her head.

_I know._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I know. But I really needed this chapter. Just give it a chance and check another one?


	3. Echoes

"So you got yourself stabbed with...what was it exactly?"

Valerie asked as Connor sat down.

"A screwdriver," he said absentmindedly. He scanned his system again, but everything was running smoothly. So why did he feel so  _wrong_? He had followed his instinct, he was just defending himself. " _Yes I killed him but I was just defending myself"_ _said Traci between sobs, her voice full of hate._ But it was different. She…  _it_  was just a machine. Not a living being.

"You are soaked to the skin. Here, take this," Valerie said and tossed him a towel.

He caught it with one hand and wiped his face.

"Could you take off your jacket, please? Oh, and the shirt too, I need some access to that wound. Drop the clothes to the bucket on your left," she wasn't looking at him, busy preparing the tools.

He undressed quickly and watched her tie her hair in a high ponytail. There was some aura of sadness around her. She looked better than yesterday though, the shade still present under her eyes, but it seemed that she finally got some sleep.

Valerie turned to him and eyed him up and down. Suddenly she bit her lip and snorted.

"Is something wrong?" Connor asked, tilting his head.

"No, nothing," - _is she blushing?-_  "I just… well, Peggy Carter came through my mind for a second," she giggled.  _Well that is certainly a first._

"Who is Peggy Carter?" he asked, confused.

"She's a character in those old movies about superheroes… Oh God, I'm sorry, that was so unprofessional," Valerie cleared her throat and sat down in front of him. "So, a stab wound, huh? At least it's just one, not _twenty eight,_ " she looked up to meet his eyes.

"You've heard about that one?" his eyebrow furrowed.

"Oh yeah, everybody is talking about the first android detective's interrogation," she pointed at the hole on his chest "May I?"

Connor nodded. Valerie gently touched the edge of a place where the screwdriver pierced through plastic, the playful sparks still glimmering in the eyes. Her fingers were cold but he didn't mind, the feedback from the sensors was actually  _surprisingly pleasant_.

"It shouldn't take long, two wires are damaged and there is a small leak from the other one," she shot him a quick look "but for some reason you seem to be overheating just a little bit."

 _Shit._  "That's probably because of the leak," he lied smoothly, trying to ignore the warning popping up in front of his eyes.

Valerie wasn't convinced, but decided not to say anything. She grabbed her tools and started working on the wires. As she was trying different angles for the best access, she occasionally placed her other hand on his chest, and it took  _a lot_  of his processing power to force his thirium pump to remain steady.  _What is happening?_ As he tried to divert his attention to something else another wave of flashbacks hit him hard –  _the blue haired Traci weeping over the lifeless body on the ground, "You've taken her away from me. I love her..." her voice breaking "_ _I loved her."_

"Connor are you alright?"

He blinked few times focusing on a woman in front of him. She looked worried, her lips pressed into a line.

Connor lowered his head. "I'm not sure."

"What's wrong?" she asked, placing one hand on his arm.

 _"Why? Why did you killed her? She had nothing to do with any of this..."_  echoed on the loop inside his head.

"Do you want me to run some diagnostics?"

At first, he wanted to decline, but he  _needed to know._ Connor's eyes met hers and he nodded.

Valerie quirked her eyebrow and rolled her chair to the desk. She gave him a pad. "Place your hand here, please." She squinted her eyes as data flooded the terminal's screen. "Everything seems fine, as far as I can tell. Even the temperature is back to normal. The programming isn't really my thing, but I can't find anything glitching. What is your internal checkup saying?"

"The same."  _That's impossible_. "So there are no sings of-" the word got stuck before it left his mouth.

"Of what?  _Deviancy_?" she winced at the term. "No, you're not a deviant, Connor. Your system's boundaries are intact. Is that what this is about?"

He closed his eyes,  _embarrassed_. He heard that she left her chair and sat next to him on the workbench. There was a moment of silence and then he felt her hand on top of his own.

"Why don't you tell me what happened today?" Valerie said, her voice soft and soothing.

So Connor told her everything. She remained silent, only squeezed his hand gently when he was talking about shooting that Traci and what happened afterwards. "...and now I can't stop thinking about this, I can't erase it from my memory banks because it's a part of my mission and I  _have to_  remember. But its  _face,_ what it said… It's  _haunting_  me." he said and opened his eyes and looked at Valerie. She was blinking fast, fighting the tears, her lower lip was trembling. He didn't know why but he felt like there was more to her reaction than just his story.

"Oh Connor, I'm so sorry," she whispered.

They sat like that for a while, her hand still holding his.

"I don't know how to help you from the technical side, but I think I could try something else, if you're up to it," she raised her eyebrow, a shade of smile on her lips.

"Anything."

Valerie hugged him.

For a split second Connor was certain his sensors were about to overload. And then everything stopped. He embraced her, focusing solely on this moment. Valerie, tense at first, melted into his arms and stroked his back slowly. He made sure to save this memory deep in his data banks.

She pulled back. "Did it work?" she asked, a sheepish grin lighting her face.

"I don't think that's a standard CyberLife's protocol, engineer Jones," he said and winked. "But I think it did."

Valerie burst into laughter. "Yeah, but it definitely is a standard  _human_  protocol."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not really sure about the previous ones, but I'm pretty happy how this one played out.  
> What do you think?


	4. Numbness

"So they finally let you out of that den of yours?"

Valerie scoffed as the older man sat on a bar stool next to her. "Good evening to you too, Hank. Or should I rather say good morning?" she said and took a sip of a whiskey.

"There is nothing good about it," he grumbled and waved at the bartender "I'll have whatever she's havin'."

Valerie shot him a look, the brow quirked.  _Seems like he_ _had_ _a few already_ , she thought to herself and then her gaze switched to the empty glasses in front of her.

_Oh, right._

As soon as Connor left the workshop she felt that she really needed a drink. It was late anyway and the evening seemed quiet enough to take a breather.

Valerie and Hank clinked their glasses and just sat there, lost in their thoughts.

One and a half drink later Hank cleared his throat and turned his head to her. "Something on your mind, kid? Not like you're always a little ray of sunshine, but this amount of broodin' is highly unusual for you."

Valerie gave him a bitter laugh. "I was about to ask you the same question, actually," she really wasn't drunk enough to talk about what was bothering her. "How are  _you_  holding up?"

Hank shrugged, emptied his glass and ordered them another round.

"Those fucking deviant cases are keeping me busy enough..." he said, the corner of his lip rising in a sad smile.

Valerie remembered how devastated Hank was after Cole's death, how disappointed he was when she told him about the CyberLife's internship that she accepted. How their relationship went colder after every argument they had. She had fought so hard for this fragile truce they had now and was determined to keep it.

"Right," Valerie said and shook her head "I totally forgot that they have assigned Connor to  _you."_

"Yeah, and he's been a pain in the ass ever since," Anderson rolled his eyes.

She gasped. "Holy shit man, have you really just referred to the android as a ' _he_ '?" she said and when he gave her the stink eye she started laughing. "You must really like him, don't you?"

"Very funny Val, don't choke on your whiskey," he sighed. "The truth is, the longer I stay on this case the more I'm not sure about this whole  _'machines don't feel anything'_  crap," Hank shook his head. "Those girls in the Eden Club today -"

"Oh yeah, I've heard about them," Valerie chimed in, staring at him with her mouth open in disbelief.

"- they really seemed… wait a second, what? When?" his eyebrows furrowed.

"Your partner dropped by earlier this evening," she said, her finger tracing the edge of the glass. "I have never seen him so  _upset_." Her heart clenched at the memory of Connor sitting next to her with his eyes closed and that shade of pain which tainted his voice as he talked about what had happened. Hank scoffed.

"So that's why his head was shining like a fucking lighthouse all the way to the precinct, huh," he rubbed his neck "He seems so human and  _not human_ at the same time, I can't really figure him out."

"You know, when we were first introduced to this model, they said that the RK800 can take so much system instability like no other before him," Valerie smiled as her thoughts went back to that moment. Her eyes lit up. "I remember his performance tests on the VR sims in August, the way he moves…" she smacked her lips and giggled "...hot damn."

Anderson was eyeing her with a mix of amusement and disgust on his face.

"Geez Val, don't you fuckin' tell me you actually find this plastic goofball  _attractive_."

Normally she would be blushing hard at this moment, but she already felt blissful numbness caused by the alcohol. She just smirked. "Well, his lead project designer is  _really_  known for his attention to detail and his trademark is putting a quite nice  _equipment -_ " Valerie teased and watched with a shit-eating grin as Hank snorted and started coughing.

"No. Fuck no. But  _why_  – no, you know what,  _don't_  say anything. No more booze for you today kiddo, gimme that," he snatched her glass and drank the whole thing. "I'm taking you home."

Valerie got up a little too fast and suddenly felt dizzy.  _Yeah, probably a good idea._  They walked out of the bar and headed back to their neighborhood.

"By the way, your poor excuse of a father called me last week," Hank shot Valerie a quick look. "He asked me again to try to convince you to pick up your phone when he tries to reach you."

"Wow..." she took a deep breath "And what did you tell him?"

"What do you think?" he bridled at her question. "I told him to fuck off and leave you alone. The nerve of this prick, I swear to God..."

The corner of her mouth twitched into a smile and she exhaled slowly. "Thanks."

They walked in silence for a few more blocks.

"You didn't answer my question, Val."

There it was, the familiar weight on her chest, the crippling guilt making her fight for every breath.

"What do you want me to say Hank?" she said hesitantly. "That I can't stand going back to that empty house? That it's even worse at work, where everything constantly reminds me of her? How I can't sleep, running different scenarios in my head and trying to understand how the fuck did I miss all of the warning signs? Or when I finally fall asleep how I wake up screaming because there she was, dying in arms  _again_  and I couldn't do anything to stop this?" Valerie shook her head and sighed.

"Jesus Val, I had no idea," Hank said under his breath. He wrapped one arm around her and pulled her closer as they continued the pace. "You wanna stay at my place tonight? Sumo will be happy to see you again."

"I would love that, thank you," she whispered, overwhelmed by his reaction.

When they reached Hank's house and the giant dog welcomed them at the door, Valerie's face lit up. "Sumo! Come here, I've missed you so much buddy!"

Sumo barked once and licked her face, his tail wagging happily. She laughed and scratched his chest.

Anderson took her coat and hung it next to his jacket by the door. "Just make yourself at home, I'll find some blanket for you."

A few minutes later Hank came back to the room only to find Valerie on the floor, cuddled to Sumo and sleeping.

He put a blanket on her and smiled to himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like dogs. Can you believe?


	5. Promise

Connor opened the door to the workshop and noticed Valerie sitting at the desk and staring at her terminal. She had her headphones on and was swaying her head gently.

"Are you busy?" he asked, closing the door behind him.

Her head darted at the sound of his voice. Valerie looked at him, took off the headphones and tossed them aside. "No, I got Hank's message and I've been waiting- … what the hell happened this time, Connor?!" Valerie's eyes widened as she jumped from her chair and rushed towards him. She parted his unbuttoned shirt slightly and gasped. "My God, did somebody  _rip_  your thirium pump regulator  _out_?" Her voice was tense as her eyes scanned him quickly, looking for more traces of blue blood. "And your hand..."

_I wonder what was in that message that made her this... agitated._  Connor shook his head and placed one hand on her shoulder to calm her down.

"It's nothing serious. See?" he reached into his pocket for the coin. As he tried to roll it on the knuckles of the injured hand, the coin fell on the floor. Connor picked it up quickly and tried again, but only to the same result.  _Shit._

Valerie smacked her lips and crossed her arms. "Riiight…  _Anyway_ , you know the drill. You can leave the shirt on this time, though," she winked at him and smiled.

She went back to her desk and handed him a bottle of thirium as he sat down in front of her. "So, what happened today? I've seen the news."

While Connor was talking, she started wiping the blue blood off his left hand with a wet piece of cloth, glancing at him from time to time and nodding. He exposed his hand fully and discovered that the feedback from its sensors grew stronger every time her long fingers ran back and forth over his while she checked their range of motion. Suddenly his mind started drifting towards the memory of her touch on his bare chest, so he forced himself to focus on his story. In the meantime, Valerie took another piece of cloth and moved her chair a bit closer to him. She pointed at his pump regulator and looked at him with a raised eyebrow, waiting for his consent to proceed.

Connor nodded.

Valerie tilted her head and started unbuttoning his shirt -  _or what was left to unbutton anyway._ When she got to the last button she looked up to meet his eyes and her lips curled into a smirk.

His mind went blank.

He took a sip from the bottle, running the complete internal checkup at the same time.  _All systems_ _are_ _fully operational._   _No errors detecte_ _d._

"-what is your internal checkup saying?"

Connor froze.  _How does she know?_ He blinked twice. "What do you mean?"

Valerie's brow quirked at that question. "I asked about your pump regulator? I don't wanna take it out unless it's absolutely necessary. So if everything is alright there, I'll just run a few tests-"

"Thirium pump and its regulator are fully operational," he said and the corner of his lips twitched into a smile.

"Glad to hear it," she smiled back at him and started wiping down the edges of the bio-component. "So you shot him?"

"Yes," Connor said, going back to his story. "I wanted it alive. Maybe I should have done something different, but Lieutenant Anderson said that I saved human lives… so I think that is  _good enough_ in the end."

"Of course it is," she said, grabbing a welding pen. She took his hand and started fixing the wires. Suddenly she snorted and shook her head.

"What is it?" he said, furrowing his eyebrows.

"It's nothing. I've just remembered the first time we met."

He searched his memory banks. "You were on the team that was assigned to my repairs after that deviant PL600 case."

"Yes,  _Negotiator_ _,_ " Valerie rolled her eyes and chuckled. "It was a coincidence really, I was just dropping something for my friend when you got back and he asked me to cover for him so he could go on a date."

"I didn't know that."

"Yeah, I figured," she shot him a quick look. "You seem… different."

That caught him off guard. "I've received some system upgrades since then," he said slowly, unsure what to make of that comment.

"No, I'm talking about _you_ , as in you've developed a certain personality. And don't tell me that it is  _only_  your ability to adapt or that it's  _just_  your programming simulating all that to make you more efficient at your job, I know all about it, remember?" she said and pinched the bridge of her nose, smiling. "I'm sorry. What I really mean is… it's just so interesting to observe this process. Definitely one of my favorite parts of this job."

She focused back on his hand. Connor's LED flashed yellow, as he considered her words.

"Can I ask you a question, Valerie?" he asked after a while.

"Sure, Connor, what's up?" she said, turning his hand around so she could check the other side of the wound.

"I'm just curious... how come that after all this time working as the CyberLife's engineer, you still look at androids as something more than just machines? I bet you could disassemble any unit and put it back together in less than one hour."

She looked him in the eyes and hesitated for a moment, then she swapped her tools and proceeded with repairs. "Okay, first of all, I scored 29 minutes at that test, thank you. Second of all, do you think that every -" she snapped her fingers twice as she tried to think of a good comparison "- surgeon sees other people as nothing more than a pile of meat and fluids just because they happen to see all of the stuff inside? Sure, maybe  _some_  of them do, but you get my point, right?"

"I think I do," Connor said, watching her body tense. He suspected that there were some things that she didn't want to tell him, but he decided to not push her further.

They sat in silence until she finished fixing his hand.

Finally, she rubbed her eyes and smiled. "Done. Give it a try now."

Connor took the coin out of his pocket, rolled it across his knuckles and tossed it between his hands. Everything was back to normal.

"Wow. You have to teach me some of  _that_  one day," Valerie said, watching the tricks in awe.

"I can teach you something now. Unless you have something else to do?" he asked, hoping to stay with her a little while longer. Even though sometimes he couldn't understand her, he really enjoyed her company.

"Well, I should prep this one android for the evidence room… but I guess he wouldn't mind," she ran her hand through her hair. "Show me something basic for starters."

Connor rolled the coin slowly across his knuckles and handed it to her. "Your turn."

Valerie tried to copy his movements, but the coin kept sliding between her fingers and landing on the floor.

"Oh God, I am  _useless_ ," she laughed, embarrassed, as she picked it up again.

"No, you're not. May I?" he took her hand and placed it on top of his own. "Relax your hand and let me guide you… like this. See?"

With his help, she managed to make the coin move across her knuckles back and forth few times before she dropped it once again.

"Shit! I'll get that," she said diving under the desk. While Valerie was trying to get up, she banged her head on it. "Fuck!" she hissed and staggered back to Connor. "Bloody hell, why do I have to be this clumsy..."

He grabbed her gently by the arms to help her regain balance and scanned her quickly -  _heart rate slightly elevated_ ,  _no signs of concussion._

"Are you alright?" he asked and Valerie laughed nervously.

"Yeah," she rubbed the back of her head awkwardly. "Just another addition to my never-ending list of injuries."

He tilted his head and pointed at the scar on her eyebrow. "What about that one?"

"That,  _actually,_  was me being stupid and getting into a fight with a girl wearing a big-ass ring," she said as she frowned at the memory.

"You're quite a fighter," Connor said rising his eyebrows, amused.

"I guess I can stand up for myself and people I care about," Valerie shrugged and sighed. "Speaking of…" she said quietly and put her hand on his chest. "Promise me you'll be more careful next time, please?"

He opened his mouth to tell her that if something happened he would be replaced and nothing would change. That he was irrelevant. That his mission was all that mattered. But then he looked into her eyes.

Connor put his hand on hers and squeezed it lightly.

"I promise."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof, this one took me longer than I expected - maneuvring between certain plot points can be tricky - but whoomp, there it is! ^^’


	6. Pieces

Valerie pulled into her driveway. As she left the car, she glanced at Hank's house just to see someone going out of the door. She squinted her eyes in disbelief.  _That can't be him._

"Connor?" she said, waving her hand. The man shot her a look and stopped.

She crossed the road quickly to meet him.

"What are you doing here?" Valerie asked, eyeing him up and down. The way he looked now, dressed in a casual outfit, made her heart beat faster.  _He will be the death of me_ _one day, I swear_ _._  "And what's with the clothes?"

"I'm going to Jericho. I have to stop Markus," he said with indifferent face.

_Oh no._

She could feel her blood pressure rising, the pulsing noise banging loudly in her ears.

"Is that what  _you_  really want?" Valerie said slowly, searching his eyes for even the smallest sign of a doubt. But there was none.

"It doesn't matter what I want. This is my order and I was  _designed_  to obey," Connor said as if he was stating the most obvious thing in the world.

She knew there was no point in arguing with him now when he was all set on his mission. Seeing him like this, distant and focused, deep within the boundaries of his program… she felt a cold shiver running down her spine. She could only hope that he would make a good decision when it comes to it.  _Good_ _for him? For CyberLife? Or for his kind?_

She bit her lip and let out a long sigh.

"I get it. Your  _mission_. And you always accomplish your mission. Just…" Valerie cleared her throat to get rid of a lump that was nearly choking her, "...come back to us. In one piece, if you can."

Connor nodded and walked away.

As she was watching him go, she felt like her heart was shattering.  _He's gonna get himself killed this time, isn't he?_  She took off her necklace, always hidden under her clothes. A small raw mountain crystal pendant glimmered in the streetlights. Valerie closed her eyes and said a short prayer to the universe.

She ran after Connor and caught him around the corner.

"Connor, wait up!"

He looked over the shoulder and slowed down. Valerie stopped in front of him, determined.

"I know it's stupid… but take this with you, please," she said and handed him the necklace.

He stared at it with a puzzled look on his face. Then a corner of his lips twitched and Valerie felt a wave of relief. _He's not totally gone_ _._

"Thank you," Connor said as he put the necklace in his jacket's inner pocket and looked her in the eyes.

Without giving it much thought, Valerie stood on her tiptoes and kissed him quickly on a cheek.

"Good luck," she whispered and turned away to leave. Suddenly, he grabbed her hand. She held her breath and met his intense gaze.

"Don't worry, I remember what I've promised," he said, his voice low and raspy. "I'll come see you after."

 

 

* * *

"Hank, it's been almost 48 hours!

"You know that he can take care of himself."

"His tracker is deactivated! And those CyberLife assholes banned all us from accessing any status information of RK800 models."

"Fuck."

"…Hank …what if-"

"Don't even think about it, Val. Go home. I'll call ya as soon as I hear anything."

* * *

 

 

Her eyes were glued to the TV screen. She couldn't believe it. Apparently neither could the reporter, hovering over the scene in his helicopter.

"The deviants… the deviants are singing!"

The song of hope.

The song of peace.

Their united voices hit her like a train, the melody and the words pulling on every string of her very soul.

Valerie tried to spot a familiar figure among the androids.  _He's not there._

She jumped at the sound of incoming message on her phone.

She took a deep breath and read it.

_\- he's OK -_

Her knees gave way and she sat on the floor, laughing and crying at the same time. She could hear the androids singing as she pressed her palms to her face, trying to stop the sobs.

"Everything will be alright… everything will be alright."

Valerie looked up on the TV screen.  _This is it. The moment of truth._

"It looks like… yes, the military is withdrawing."

Then she let it all out.

 

* * *

 

_AMANDA!_

_...there's got to be a way._


	7. Trust

Connor spent all night making sure the CyberLife won't be able to resume control over him ever again.

His first instinct was to contact Valerie and ask her to help him disappear from the CyberLife's system and to check for any more backdoors in his program, but then he remembered how, after running some diagnostics, she told him that everything was fine.  _Was that a lie?_ _Or did she know exactly what was_ _my_ _purpose?_ Suddenly he felt like he was in Zen Garden all over again. Cold. Lost. _Betrayed._ That's how the others found him, sitting by the metal container with the arms wrapped around his knees, shaking.

Now Connor was standing on the roof, waiting for the sunrise, hoping that with the sunlight there would come some sort of enlightenment about what he should do now.

He looked at the pendant in his hand. North would probably yell at him and throw it out, just in case it would turn out to be some sort of a tracking device.

" _You can't trust her, Connor. She's from CyberLife!"_

" _She must have known about this."_

" _She betrayed you."_

" _She could have warn you."_

" _You are home now."_

" _Just forget about her."_

If only that would be so simple.

They were right. Maybe. Connor wasn't sure anymore. A part of him regretted telling them about her at all.

Suddenly, he heard footsteps.

"Is that hers?"

"Yes," he replied, looking at the blonde-haired android standing next to him.

"Did she tell you why she gave it to you?" Simon asked, curiously glancing at the necklace in Connor's hand.

"No," he shook his head, "but it seemed to be really important to her."

They stood in silence, watching the rising sun.

"What would  _you_  do?"

"I don't know. Can you tell me something more about her?"

Connor reached out his hand and allowed Simon to connect to his memories.

He wasn't ready for the chaotic wave of images that flooded him. The hug. Her tired face in the break room. The first time they met. Her smirk while she was unbuttoning his shirt. The precise movements of her hands during the repairs. Her cold fingers on his chest. The playful lights in her eyes. Her furrowed eyebrows while she was searching for possible glitches in his software. The worried voice as she was checking his wounds. Her determination when she gave him his necklace. The blush on her face. Her laugh. The softness of her lips on his cheek-

The connection was broken.

Simon gave him an inquiring look.

"You really care about this woman, don't you?"

Connor was unable to speak, still recovering from the intensity of the flashbacks, so he just nodded.

"Whatever you decide… keep in mind that there is a probability that she had no idea about this whole mess. Statistically speaking, of course," Simon smiled and patted Connor's shoulder. "And she seems to care a lot about you too."

 

 

* * *

 

 

"I'm sure some of the androids will be happy to come back to the precinct, Lieutenant. I'll talk with Markus and maybe we can arrange-" he stopped mid-sentence when he spotted Valerie coming out of the archive room.

"Hey Val! Look who's back!" Hank waved his hand to get her attention and smacked Connor on the back.

She noticed them and her face lit up.

All he wanted right now was to take her in his arms and never let her go, but he just couldn't tune his doubts out. Instead, he just turned his head away slightly when she approached them, still unsure how to handle this conversation.

Valerie slowed down, surprised.

"Connor?"

When he didn't respond, she tilted her head to try to meet his eyes. "What-"

There it was, a glimpse of Zen Garden again.  _"What was planned from the very beginning… You did what you were designed to do."_

When he finally looked at her, he could no longer hide how hurt and betrayed he felt.

Valerie took a step back and turned pale. She closed her eyes and let out a shaky breath. She looked back at him and the pain in her eyes made him feel like someone ripped his thirium pump regulator again.

"It's good to see you again in one piece, Connor," she said quietly and gave Anderson a sad smile. "See you later."

Hank looked at both of them in confusion. As soon as Valerie walked away, he grabbed Connor's arm.

"What the hell was  _that_  about?" Anderson asked.

Connor shook his head and shrugged. "After all that's happened, I'm not sure if I can trust Valerie," he said, desperately trying to erase the painful look in her eyes from his memory banks.

"Are you out of your goddamn mind?!" Hank scoffed, staring at him angrily.

"The CyberLife tried to resume control of me after the protest. They-… they said they've planned it all along-"

"Jesus fucking Christ, Connor, this is insane! She was worried sick about your stupid plastic ass! I've seen her  _threatening_  some guy over the phone just to get  _any_  sort of confirmation that you are alive after that fucking raid-"

"This doesn't prove  _anything_!" Connor burst out, shaking off Hank's hand from his arm.

Anderson threw his hands in the air and groaned, fed up. He pointed at his partner, his face tense and serious.

"Listen, Val is like a daughter to me. There is  _no way_  she would consciously agree to any of this shit, ever," Hank sighed heavily. "Just… go talk to her."

 

 

* * *

 

 

Connor found her near the Ambassador Bridge.

_Obviously._

Valerie was leaning against a barrier, looking at the river. He joined her and mirrored her pose, making up his mind. She glanced at him but said nothing.

"Did you know?" Connor asked, finally turning toward her to study her reaction.

She burrowed her eyebrows and looked at him, puzzled. "What do you mean?"

"May I have your phone, please."

She reached to her coat's pocket and gave him the phone.

Connor placed his hand on the screen, quickly uploaded a file and gave it back to her.

He watched her closely as she opened a video, the recorded memory of his last conversation with Amanda. Her eyes widened and she opened her mouth. When the video ended, she played it once again. Her hands started shaking, so she tightened her grip on the phone.

"Motherfuckers… They've never said  _anything_  about this-, this-" she muttered through the gritted teeth, "I had no idea. If only… fuck, there must have been some traces of this shit in your code and I've missed it…" and then it hit her. She gasped and looked at him in horror. "You think- Connor, I  _swear_  I didn't know anything about this. I-I should have… Damn it, I didn't know!" Valerie shook her head and covered her face with her palms.

Connor couldn't take it anymore. He took a step forward and embraced her.

"I believe you."

She wrapped her arms around him.

"I'm so, so sorry..." Valerie whispered into his jacket, still shaking slightly. She pulled back a little just to be able to look in his eyes. "I was so scared… Are you alright?"

Connor pressed his forehead to hers and closed his eyes, smiling.

"I've never been better."


End file.
